On Saturday, I had yet another ECT treatment. This isn't something I love, but it's something I'm finding necessary for my mental health. I don't mind the going to sleep part, but the waking up groggy for hours with a dry mouth part is much less pleasant. Usually, when I wake up, I get wheeled out to the car, sleep all the way home, and then sleep for five to seven more hours there. This week was different.
This week, I slept home, but once I got there, I couldn't fall back asleep. I tried all my usual standbys, but I couldn't get to sleep, and I was BORED. It was driving me crazy! Social media didn't help, reading didn't help, podcasts and audiobooks didn't help, I was incurably bored. Finally, I tried socializing with other people, which is not one of my go-to boredom relievers, but it worked! And I realized that it was working because I was feeling a way I hadn't felt in years: normal.
So instead of wanting to waste all my time keeping my brain distracted from reality, what I wanted was to engage in life at a level I hadn't done in months, maybe even years. So since then, I've talked to people and exercised and done all sorts of things. I'm hoping it lasts!
