April 16, 2012

Winning the Depression War...


            So, I wrote a play.  It was a one-act, and it wasn’t that good.  But then for an assignment this year, I butchered it and turned it into a ten minute play.  And then my group decided to perform it.  Which was basically incredible.  So I re-wrote it so it would suck less.  And then stuff went down and I had to star in it, too.  Which was terrifying.  Not the being onstage thing, I’m fine with that.  What was terrifying is that the main character is sort of me.  AKA she’s a self-injurer.  And she does it onstage.  Which means I had to pretend to cut myself onstage.  I haven’t cut myself at all during 2012 *knockonwood* which is crazy considering I checked myself into the hospital for it just last October.  So I was a little worried about what would happen if I had to pretend to go there.  But you know what?  It was surprisingly liberating.  As the lights faded to blackout and the audience began to applaud, I felt free.  And I felt strong.  And I felt like, “You know what?  Maybe I can do this whole ‘life’ thing…”

2 comments:

  1. Wow, Ashleigh. That is a powerful story. That had the potential to be such a trigger for you. It is such a vulnerable thing to put our stories out there. Thank you for sharing your strength.

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    Replies
    1. You're welcome. Thank you for reading. It's so terrifying to share, but the more I do it, the stronger I feel. I just hope it somehow helps someone else someday.

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Thank you for coming. I hope you get something out of this. I hope you learn about yourself. I hope you get help if you need it or give it if you can.